Length of Shower: I showered because I thought you were showering --It can happen at anytime and almost anyplace. It can happen when you expect it, or when you least expect it. It can't really happen on-line but it can happen while you are in a line. It can happen while you are riding public transportation or while you are driving. I'm talking about seeing someone you think you know and giving them a wave. Or the real question is: how long do you wait before committing to the wave?
The other day I was standing in line at a coffee shop called The Coffee Bean and as I glanced over my shoulder I saw an old friend of mine walk into the shop. I stared at him for like one quick second to confirm that it was him and then shot up my entire arm, almost taking the ear off of the person behind me in line, to give him a big "I miss you" wave. The stranger looked at me and frowned before bowing his head and looking at something on his phone. It was not, in fact, my friend and I was caught waving at no one. Of course everyone in the shop, except the one guy I was waving at, is now looking at me and asking themselves, "Who the heck is that guy waving at?" So, I dropped my dorky grin along with my lanky right arm and proceeded to feel awkward and embarrassed. Clearly I needed to wait longer than one second before committing to a wave.
The following day as I was driving to The Body Shop (details of "why" are not important) I drove next to another friend of mine in the lane next to me. Wanting to honk and wave, but remembering the coffee shop event from earlier, I wanted to confirm for sure this time. So, I drove up next to her and eerily started staring into the car as we drove side-by-side down the road. Finally, she turned her head once, twice, then a third time before staring at me for a long few seconds and then smiled and gave me a big wave. She recognized me! But I actually didn't recognize her at all. So I gave a half smile, but no wave, and backed my car off from her in an awkward moment of embarrassment for both of us.
Then, today I saw someone I definitely knew and I knew they knew me and all we did was stare at each other without waving at all out of fear for looking like a dork who commits too early to a wave. So, of course being men all we did then was give a little head nod to each other, thus remaining safe in our own box of "coolness", and went about our day. Later one of us will probably text or e-mail the other and say, "good to see you the other day" in a way of really finishing what should have been a committed wave to begin with.
These cases really got me thinking about the unspoken conversation that goes on when you see someone you know, or think you know, but neither of you want to commit to the wave first. You know that lighting fast conversation of "Hey, do I know you? Do you remember me? Oh, you do, great! Can I wave at you? Will you wave back? OK, let's wave together. Ready? No, you're not ready? Oh, you are ready? OK then on three. One. Two. No, we are going to wave after three? OK, so it's three and then wave or is it wave on three? On three. OK. Got it. One. Two. Three!" But of course this entire conversation takes a matter of seconds (which is amazing to me how fast the mind works by the way). Then you both finally wave and the stress you didn't even realize was there gets relieved when you both commit to waving at each other in a nice, open and friendly way.
I mean I say to heck with all this stuff and just wave people. Why not? What's the worst that will happen? You feel embarrassed? OK, how about this: Don't ever allow yourself to feel embarrassed about a friendly wave. Allow the wave, but don't allow the embarrassment. I say, "Commit to the wave!" I vow to commit to waving at anyone I think I know. And I will be the one to commit early if that's what it takes. And if I don't know you, then I will simply smile and say, "Oh sorry. I thought I knew you. By the way, my name is Matt." There! Now the worst that can happen is that I meet a new friend, who probably looks a lot like another friend of mine, but so what? More friends is always a good thing.
So, there you have it, another problem solved! Just wave away folks. Feel free to wave and not feel bad for it anymore. We need more carefree dorks in the world anyway, we are all way to busy trying to be "cool" when just being your happy self is really more endearing worthwhile anyway.
So here is my big, dorky, fully committed hand and arm wave to you right now!
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