May Day!

Length of Shower: Is there a special phrase I should use if things start to go south in the shower?  --May 1st is kinda the weakest holiday I can think of.  It's not an official holiday and there is little-to-no commitment in celebrating it as anything other than the first day of the month that contains the day we associate as the unofficial start to summer.  But it's a holiday anyway, so let's talk about it.

I know that on May Day we are supposed to give out little baskets of candy to our friends and neighbors and then run away before they can thank you.  Kinda like some random, but purposeful, act of kindness.  Although how kind is it that we are encouraging our neighbors to eat a lot of candy that is unhealthy for them?  What, are we trying to kill them off so we can make an offer on their house before anyone else?

And speaking of death, where does the phrase "Mayday" come from?  When a plane is in trouble and about to crash, pilots get on the radio and cry, "Mayday, Mayday."  Why?  Are they wanting to celebrate a random and week holiday just before their death?  Why not just scream "Help!" like everyone else would?  What does "Mayday" say that "Help" would not?  

Where does this holiday come from, anyway?  I will admit that I cheated a bit with this blog and actually did some research (not much, but a little. I did this for your benefit; thank me later).  In the research it says that today is really just a mix of other smaller holidays.  According to one website: "It's a celebration of Spring and a day of political protests. It's a neopagan festival, a saint's feast day, and a day for organized labor."  Say What?  How is all that considered one holiday?  It sounds about as confused as an adolescent boy with an erection in a bathroom of other boys but pictures of naked woman on the walls.  A "neopagan festival" and a "saint's feast day" while also being a "celebration of Spring" while we should be doing "political protests."  What!?  How is this day a holiday?  And how did we get from all that confusion to dropping baskets of candy at our neighbor's doorstep?  


No wonder most people ignore this holiday and do nothing.  It sounds more like a day of confusion than a holiday.  I think I will ignore it too, and just look forward to the real holiday in May....Cinco de Mayo!!  Wait, that's not an American holiday at all and nor is it "official".  Darn it!  These holiday's can be so confusing sometimes.